Second interview question answered!

Elder Michael Austin Davis - serving a mission in Las Vegas

Family photo taken at Ryan and Sarah's wedding (everyone present but Michael and Marc)

(Jeffrey and Jennifer, Laura Lee, Tanner, Sarah and Ryan, William and Lynda, and Addie Kay)

Okay - here is the answer to my second Interview question:

Question:

#2) You have four sons and one daughter, what has been the biggest difference raising them?

There are several major differences that come to mind concerning rearing our four sons verses our one daughter.

Difference #1 - MODESTY

In our faith, modesty is something we place great importance on.

We believe our bodies are like Temples and we need to treat them with respect, and dignity. We believe that the way we dress reflects our inner self. We believe we should dress reflective of the truth that we are daughters and sons of God.

This modesty issue was very hard rearing a daughter. I think I had maybe one issue with a son (once ) when I asked him to pull his shorts up (they were riding low) so I wouldn't have to see his underwear. For guys - there are no problems finding decent clothes which are vogue. For girls - especially in our area - it's been a major PAIN and challenge!

For Laura Lee, the modesty challenge began when she was about age twelve. She needed a long formal dress for a piano recital. I found a pattern and had a friend make a beautiful pale yellow dress out of fabric Laura Lee selected. She looked adorable in it. I remember hemming that dress. It was lovely. I didn't think the modesty issue would be that difficult.

Next came church girls camp. I bought jeans for her and cut them off (knee length) and sewed them all. Okay, not quite so hard, but very time consuming! (This was long BEFORE the longer shorts became stylish).

It got WORSE from there! Laura Lee turned sixteen and could now date. She was asked to go to proms (sometimes up to three times a year). I took her shopping for a dress (there are NO DECENT modest prom dresses anywhere in our area) and we found a dress she really liked. It had spaghetti straps however and I decided I could make one just like it, but with sleeves. I bought all the fabric necessary for my dress creation. I started sewing it as similar to the original as I could. It has major gathering across the bodice. I thought I did a great job altering and sewing it. When Laura Lee tried it on (in the beginning stage) she didn't like it at all. I was beside myself. I had not only purchased the fabric, but had spent hours cutting and sewing the fabric. We ended up going and buying the spaghetti strap dress and my friend made a "bolero" to go over it with a matching purse. She came home from the prom with it all torn up (from people stepping on it).

The next year I decided I wasn't going to mess with the sewing. I ordered an expensive modest dress through an online store. It was beautiful. When we received it, it didn't fit Laura Lee whatsoever. There wasn't time to mail it back and get another one in time for her prom. I thought it was way overpriced anyway. I don't remember what she did for a dress that year, but it was stressful.

My friend (THANKS WENDY) was such a blessing for me. For other prom dresses she spent time making cap sleeves for dresses, cutting out sheets and making a mock dress out of them, putting extra fabric where it needed to go on prom dresses, etc., She was a life saver. She also gave Laura Lee sewing lessons (MY IDEA) and now Laura Lee can sew (much better than me) and will be able to deal with this issue with her daughter (much better than me) in the future!

At one point, I told Laura Lee she was now in charge of finding her own formal dresses and other clothing. Laura Lee usually did not like what I liked as far as clothing or formal wear. After my negative experiences I was DONE with it all. From then on, Laura Lee went clothes shopping with her friends. She was able to find some suitable prom dresses and other nice attire. Her friends would all come to our home and show us what they found and ask "do you approve"? They were able to get creative and I know Laura Lee had so much more fun shopping with her friends than with me!

Other articles of clothing were difficult to find too and sometimes there was a struggle of opinions between my daughter and me. I once had a sister-in-law refer to me as "the clothing Nazi". I guess she thought I was more strict than most parents.

I was SO GLAD when Prom dates were OVER for Laura Lee! I must say Laura Lee always looked stunning in her prom dresses. It's a wonderful thing for a parent to see her own daughter looking especially beautiful and feminine. HOWEVER -- buying clothing and figuring out Prom wear was SO MUCH EASIER with my sons. Go get them measured for a tux, shoes, etc., pay the bill .. and they're done!

#2 ACTIVITIES

When my sons started growing up, I realized I had never really done typical "boy" activities. William was not as "hands on" with the boys so I usually ended up being the one to take them fishing, play a baseball, soccer, or basketball game with them, play cars and trucks with them, erect lego creations together, etc., I never felt totally comfortable with these activities because I was beginner myself.

When I had my daughter, I so enjoyed doing the "girl" things. I purchased Barbies,

an Easy bake oven, made dress ups, bought pretend make up, obtained play high heels, etc.,It was fun to re -live my childhood and enjoy the world of girlhood for the second time. This was a world I understood. The male world was something foreign to me! (It still is!)

Laura Lee was sandwiched right in between two older brothers and two younger brothers. It was nice for me to have a girl right in the middle (kindof like an oreo cookie). There was someone else who was FEMALE in our home who was more similar to me than different. Having a girl was a "treat". (Like William's mother says having a boy is an honor and having a girl is dessert!)

By the time Michael and Tanner grew older, I knew a little more about boy activities than before and that helped. They did basically the same activities that Ryan and Jeffrey did, except that they were on a diving team also. I had them in dance, but that did not last long. (After Tanner dressed up as Elvis on a Jail house rock dance- William was not so supportive of this activity!)

With the boys, I had to learn all about Cub Scouts and Boy Scouts. (I think it's complicated myself!) With my sons, I learned about pine wood derbies and what boys needed for major camp outs. I learned about the "testosterone" movies (as we call them) and the wrestling that boys do. I endured many football and basketball games on TV that my sons would hoot and holler about. I went to many sports games to support and cheer on my boys! It was enjoyable and fun!

With my daughter, we grew to have the same love for dance. We came from the same mold. She enjoyed cheerleading and I could relate to that. She liked to Tumble and I could relate to that. She and I were "outnumbered" and we could relate to that. We never really watched many "Chick flicks" in our home. We were out voted and William almost always picked out the movies anyway.

#3 DIFFERENCES IN BOYS AND GIRLS

It has been interesting to see innately the differences between boys and girls and watch them first hand in my children. Girls truly do nurture, even when they are just toddlers. Boys are more rough and rowdy. They are "hunters", "hero's", and "rescuer's".

Laura Lee needed the social life with friends surrounding her. (It probably had a lot to do with the fact that she had no sisters and she needed to connect with other girls.) She was more emotional, yet she tried to be strong. She tried to fit in this family of all brothers (her father calls her a "WWF wrestler in a prom dress)".

Girls ( in Junior and Senior high school) can be so catty. It was hard to watch that aspect of what Laura Lee had to deal with.

Boys are not the gossip type. They deal with the way things are and seem to move on. They brush things off much easier.

Boys and girls are just different. It's the way God made his children. One sex is not "better" than another. I was to able recognize the good in both my sons and my daughter and celebrate their unique and different characteristics.

In rearing our children, we realized we couldn't treat them all the same. Laura Lee alway had "her own room" which the boys didn't think was fair. Laura Lee was somewhat spoiled because SHE WAS the only girl in our family. However, I have never loved my sons less. I cherish each of my children with all of my heart! They are ALL MY FAVORITES!

It is one of my GREATEST PRIVILEGES in life to be the mother of Ryan, Jeffrey, Laura Lee, Michael and Tanner. I now love being the mother-in-law to Marc, Sarah, and soon to be Jennifer. And I love being a grandmother to Addie Kay!

Interview questions

Michael in front of some buildings in New Bremen, including the old Village fire station.

A high school friend of mine gave me some "interview" questions to answer (after I "volunteered" to be interviewed). It's caused me to reflect about my life and I thought these questions and answers will also make a nice addition to my personal history for others to come to know me (especially my posterity).

I will answer a question per day. Here's my first question:

Question #1

Your family has lived in New Bremen for some time now; tell us about the experience and how it has shaped your lives.

William and I have lived in New Bremen for almost 19 years. We moved here in May of 1990 and Michael celebrated his first birthday here. We never planned on living here for so long. The advantages have been wonderful. There also have been disadvantages which I will relate later.

Overall the experience has been incredible. The village itself is quaint, historic, picturesque, and community oriented. It's truly an oasis. The village feels safe, secure and is very "well-groomed". Security is tight because of certain businesses here. We were told when we moved here that we would be "outsiders" for a long time. (We were told the community was close knit and didn't necessarily welcome move in's.) The village is kept especially lovely because of businesses who care about the community and donate in big ways to almost every aspect of our village.

When we first moved here we were impressed with the bright green, meticulously kept yards and lawns. We were impressed with how immaculate the farms were kept. We were grateful that neighbors took our children under their wings. We enjoyed the way members of our community decorated their yards (for Easter, July 4th, Thanksgiving, etc.,) We loved the "old-fashion" feel of the village. For example people driving by would just wave at us. When we first moved here, William had someone offer to loan him money at a grocery store (whom he didn't know) when he forgot his checkbook. When at the swimming pool there would be announcements over the speakers which said something like "Johnny, your mother just called and it's time for you to go home". Tellers at the bank knew our names. Things like that tickled us and we thought we had stepped back twenty years in time. We learned what a community can look like when everyone takes pride and respect in their property and community. There is not one home in New Bremen that looks "junky". It's pretty amazing. There isn't one section of homes in New Bremen that is sub-standard where others look "down" at your home or the sub-division (or farm) where you live. It's a pretty fantastic feeling to live in that kind of environment.

The homes and churches here are antique. Most of the homes on the main streets are eighty years or older. (New Bremen was founded in 1842 I believe). We were able to purchase a hundred year old home. It has been an amazing blessing for us. We have really enjoyed the "character" of our older home. We have restored our home, trying to make it more original and livable, (which can be a pain, but which also is quite rewarding). Living in and having respect for an older home has taught us more about stewardship. It also had taught us to value older things (antiques) and have a greater appreciation for the past.

When we moved to New Bremen, the school was all in one building (kindergarten through twelfth grade.) That was pretty cool. Our church was in Lima (fifty five minutes away) and our Church Stake Center was in Toledo (two hours away). That was hard, especially because we had a very young family (babies and toddlers) and we drove two cars almost every Sundays. Our church callings were usually quite demanding, and that was also challenging!

We learned to sacrifice (we would be gone most Sundays for at least five hours for church - two on the road and three for church services). We would usually drive up to the church one or two times more per week besides on Sundays. We learned to adapt, we learned to adjust, and we somehow managed. I know the Lord has blessed us for making those extra efforts and sacrifices, especially because it wasn't easy!

I started a dance business here 16 years ago. I have felt part of the community and have loved working with the boys and girls in this area. I have learned a great deal having the business (sometimes hard lessons). I have been impressed especially by the beautiful children. They are so good and so lovely and so wonderful. I have always said I get the "cream of the crop" to teach. The parents are such good mothers and fathers and their main concern is for their children's welfare. They sacrifice so their children can learn and grow and have a happy, fun, fulfilling childhood. I have learned to deal in the business world and yet try to have kindness and respect for others and their feelings.

I have become involved in an organization called (OCCL - Ohio Child Conservation League) and I teach classes at the YMCA and interact with extremely GOOD women. They are the salt of the earth kind of people. I have learned to have a unity and a respect for others, and vice versa which is very dear to my heart. I still sometimes feel like an "outsider" but with friends at every crossroad, I feel mostly like I belong and contribute to the whole. William and I have a "game night" every month with friends who are extremely diverse, yet some of the best people I have ever known. They are a light on a hill.

William and I never would have known our church and community friends had we not moved to New Bremen. Our friends are incredible people who have taught us countless lessons. They have been examples to us when we needed guidance and help. We could not have survived here without them! In a way they have substituted for our family.

William was called to be the first branch president in our little St. Marys area. That proved to be a great blessing for our family. He had many responsibilities and a brand new church was built for our branch in the first few years of his calling. Being in a branch has broadened my understanding of our Church in so many ways. The main thing I have learned is that we are all here to serve and help and lift our brothers and sisters in Christ. I knew that - but it's been reinforced by living in a branch. I watched my husband be a servant to so many and to truly care about others with compassion and love. He continues to serve in the Stake and give his all!

There have been harder aspects to living here.

Our children have had to learn to stand up for their beliefs and standards. This has not always been easy for them. They have struggled to find appropriate young men or young women to date, or go to parties where alcohol is not served, or have their religion misunderstood by teachers or students at school. It's not easy to feel different when you desire to fit in. One benefit has been that our children have learned to stand up for their beliefs and have come to know who they are maybe a little earlier than they would have. I feel they are stronger for this challenge. We once asked William's father (when he was giving William a Father's blessing) a question about a major concern of ours. We didn't want our children to "miss out" on anything and wondered if we were depriving them of anything by living so far from our extended family and others with whom our children could more easily relate to. The answer in the blessing was that parents can raise a righteous family anywhere. That has been comforting to us over the years.

The hardest aspect of living here has been living so far away from family. We have missed much in that area. Almost all of our vacations have been to go west to see our families. We have always felt that is MOST important, but we have not been able to take "our own vacations". We have not had our children as close to grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins and they have missed out on some bonding opportunities. I have struggled with that challenge, but William and I both have felt that the Lord wants us here. If we follow his guidance, he will bless us. One positive from all this is that my immediate family is extremely close. We have had to band together and be there for each other. As I ponder about living here I count my blessings! We have been so blessed living in this beautiful community!

Answers to the questions below to come:

2) You have four sons and one daughter, what has been the biggest difference raising them?

3) You enjoy physical activity and keeping busy; what is your favorite leisure time activity?

4) How did losing a brother in High School affect your life?

Do you want to be "interviewed"? (It's actually a really interesting activity!) If you would rather just email me to be interviewed that would be great too. I WANT TO INTERVIEW AT LEAST ONE PERSON - PLEASE!!

Here's How:
If you are interested in having me give you a few interview questions for you to answer on your blog, be one of the first five people to follow these instructions and I’ll be in touch.

INSTRUCTIONS1. Leave me a comment in this post saying, “Interview me” (please include your email address as well).2. I will respond by emailing you five questions of my choosing.3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.4. You will include these instructions and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions each. (Okay, if this part is stopping you, you don't have to do it). Just let me interview YOU:)

Professional Wedding Photos of Ryan and Sarah's wedding

One month down, Twenty three to go

I have had my braces on for one month now. I figure I am 1/24 of the way done!  I have a new RESPECT for every one who has worn braces. It's been HARD to say the least.

I still have sores in my mouth, and need wax on my brackets. I feel my teeth moving now, and it's a very strange sensation. Food is  hard to chew, and it doesn't taste as good. ) :

I have been a good girl and have flossed, brushed, rinsed with fluoride, and used the mini -brush  every night, and followed what the orthodontist has said (no pop, no caramel, no hard candy, etc.,). I did "suck" on popcorn - which I wasn't supposed to have but I didn't "chew" on it. (William popped it the day I got my braces on.)

After I eat, I immediately have to go use the water pick,  brush my teeth with my Sonicare and rinse with Scope. 

OH, THE SACRIFICE! I hope it will be worth it!

My New Testament Class is FINISHED!

I took my  BYU New Testament Class final today. It took me 2 and 1/2 hours with 150 questions and 2 essays. I have a headache right now. However, there is such profound sense of relief  and accomplishment when a class is finished and that feels SO GOOD!

I have LOVED taking this class. I am SO GRATEFUL for what I have learned. This class has encouraged me to study Christ's teaching, parables, miracles, his Atonement, prophecies, etc., (and how it all affects me) in new and beautiful ways. I am in such GREAT AWE of our Savior!

I have pondered lately about how HE IS THE ULTIMATE HERO. 

I ordered 2 more classes (for a total of 5 credits) two days ago.  BYU is up to $141.00 a credit. OUCH! Education is EXPENSIVE and TIME CONSUMING, but so enlightening!

I will be taking a Human Geography Class (sounds interesting, huh?) and a Doctrine and Covenants class next.  I am excited to get started! I've only taken one class at a time in the past so this is a new adventure for me. 

I called up BYU, Department of General Studies and asked them if they "extend" the time allotted to get your degree. I have been at a snail's pace these last three years.  It's hard to juggle everything, plus those two Humanities classes were BEARS!!!!!!!!!

Anyway, they don't extend anything. You can reapply, but that's about it. I AM RECOMMITTED to my life as a college student. It is so much harder NOW than when I was at BYU, but I REALLY feel this is the direction I should go. I will be getting my emphasis in Family History and that's the area that I feel impressed to study, learn about and spend my time pursuing. 

I will need to figure out what and how to "sacrifice"  for this. It will be a hard journey for me.

I will need to re-prioritize. Nothing worthwhile is easy! 

Happy birthday Marc!

Our son in-law has his birthday on February 16th. It's time to blog about him!

I have always said William and I have "the best" son-in-law! Marc is nothing short of AMAZING! He is one special young man.

When Laura Lee was dating Marc, she was often at home at night (when she wished she could be out with him). We would ask "Where is Marc?" She would answer "He has to study", or "He is home teaching", or "He is helping someone move". We were extremely impressed that Marc could be disciplined enough to realize his priorities and that as IMPORTANT as Laura Lee was to him, that he still had other important things on his plate that needed his attention. I know that is why he is as successful as he is! 

Marc has a keen intellect. He always beats us in games. (We aren't even a challenge to him).

I know he yearns for a little competition in our family. 

Marc is in his 3rd year of medical school. He was accepted into the DO (Doctor of Osteopathy) program at Des Moines, University. He has a scholarship because he is doing so well. He moved his family to Columbus, Ohio to complete his rotations there and we have LOVED having Marc, Laura Lee and Addie so close. He chose to come to Columbus, so their family could be close to ours. He works all kinds of hours and tries so hard to juggle family life, church life, friends, his health and his schooling. He has a lot on his plate, but he really works hard to keep his life balanced. Currently he is working in the field of Neurology and he really is enjoying that. He thinks the avenue he wants to pursue is that of PM and R (Physical Medicine and Rehabilitation). I believe he gets that rotation next! 

We are very proud of Marc. Laura Lee was so blessed to marry him. He has so many wonderful qualities.

Marc has a quiet strength about him. When we met Marc's father, Art, we understood where it came from. He knows he receives extra strength from the Lord when he fulfills his calling, when he reads his scriptures and when he leads his family. He does these things, and the Lord truly blesses him. Marc is strong in intellect, strong in health and body (he works hard at this by being  VERY AWARE of his diet and exercise), strong in spirit, and strong in his leadership role. 

Marc is a wonderful family man. He loves being with his family. He makes sure to take his family on outings and vacations. He spends time with Laura Lee and Addie as much as he can.

He delights in his daughter and truly cherishes his wife! One time I asked him how he was doing "juggling" everything he was. He in sincerity said "I think Laura Lee has the harder job" speaking of Laura Lee's role of being a full time mom. 

We have a standing joke in our family when we talk to Laura Lee on the ichat (when Marc is home but not on the i-chat) that he is either cooking or cleaning. He is a great cook and he cleans a lot! He is very helpful and it's such a blessing to Laura Lee!

Marc loves the outdoors and is a daredevil. Marc enjoys sports, hikes, bike riding, running, camping, skating (Hockey- he's from Canada!), and he (and Laura Lee) use to jump off of bridges. He's from the beautiful Vancouver area and enjoys the mountains.

Marc loves his brothers and sisters and parents! He has a genuine love for them all. He truly cares about each one and praises them concerning their good traits. He is close with them and has a loyalty and camaraderie with them that is tender. He sees the good in each of his siblings  and builds them up whenever he talks about them to me. He desires to be a good brother and son.

Marc is humble. He does not focus on himself. He doesn't flaunt his talents or abilities. He sees others and knows of their strengths but he truly is humble concerning his. It's overwhelmingly sweet to see someone so gifted, who think he is just ordinary!

Marc is patient. He now has to endure The Davis side of the family and he tries so hard to be patient with us. 

Marc is good to the core. He is real, he is fun, and he is true to himself.

Marc wants to make the world better. He wants to serve and give and help his fellowman. He

medically wants to help others heal. This is a genuine desire. I believe he gets this from his mother Berit. She is a nurse and serves others on a daily basis. She is a very caring, kind woman who uses her life to lift others.  I know Marc will be able to use his talents to help others manage or get rid of their pain,  and help rehabilitate others from accidents and other health problems. He is well on his way and we know he will make it happen. He is just that kind of person!

We are SO BLESSED to have Marc in our family and we love him like our own son.

Happy Birthday Marc!

We love you with all of our hearts.

Marc Musson

Another Dancer in the Family!

I love watching this clip of our little Addie Kay! I copied it from Laura Lee's blog to show off our grand daughter. The boy's name she is dancing with is Traedan.

Lynda's Birthday 2009

         The cake Tanner made "with love".

Tanner lighting the candles - no there are not 49!

I had a birthday this month. One of my  children has chided me for not mentioning it on my blog.  I wasn't going to bring it up, just because having a son become engaged and a daughter expecting another baby is so much FUNNER  to blog about. I can't tell you how blessed I am feeling about all the wonderful changes for good happening in our family. I AM SO EXCITED!

Anyway.......... I will blog a little about my birthday for those of you who are interested.

I will tell you that I had a very nice birthday. It all started the Saturday before my birthday when William wanted to celebrate it because he would be in Indiana on my real birthday. I received breakfast in bed (French toast) and a totally surprising gift of an ipod touch that William bought me. It pretty much blew me away. Tanner then made me a cake and it was the funniest/bumpiest looking cake ever (he put the cake in pie tins (he thought they were cake pans)   but it was THE BEST TASTING CAKE EVER!! It was so moist. Anyway, he said he made the cake with the best ingredient - L-O-V-E. It's a cake I will never forget - not only that Tanner made it but that it was such a sweet attempt for him on my birthday and that it was so luscious! I even got to read in bed during the day which was a treat.

Over the next few days it still felt like I was celebrating my birthday as  cards came in from friends and family. Some of the cards made me tear up because they were so thoughtful and sincere. Michael sent me the sweetest card that said on the front MOM and below that MOMMER and below that MOMMEST. Then on the inside it said "Happy birthday to the MOMMEST  MOM in the whole world. He wrote me the sweetest letter that made me cry about how much he loves me and how thankful he is for me and that I am the best mother anyone could ask for. It made my day!  On Wednesday I went out to lunch with friends.  On Thursday, (my real birthday) I was surprised that  a gentleman in one of my exercise classes brought me a homemade gift he made which was SO THOUGHTFUL! I was able to go to Enrichment Day which was lovely. After that I got my hair cut and had my nails done (such a treat!). I taught dance that evening and came home to an ice cream cake. My secret sister from my OCCL had spoiled me with a huge bag of goodies (my favorite drink - virgin Pina Colada, my favorite candy and some of my favorite magazines.

I've got a few calls and cards since my birthday that were kind.  I received phone calls from all my children on my birthday. Then yesterday, my new daughter-in-law posted the sweetest blog about me that touched my heart to the core. She made me sound a lot better than I am, but it was one of the kindest things anyone could do. 

I had a good friend from High School (Julie Bird) post a blog in January about me and it was equally touching. I feel very blessed to have such loving friends and family.  

Thank you to everyone for remembering me on my birthday. I am a sentimental, emotional person and every attempt of kindness directed my way is so special to me. In my more discouraging moments I will turn to the kind, kind things people have written about me and the assurance of how much we love each other and how blessed I am to have you in my life!

 

Another VERY EXCITING ANNOUNCEMENT!

Jeffrey and Jennifer are formally engaged! YEAH! : )

We are so happy for them and can't wait for the wedding!

We love Jenn! She already feels like a member of our family and we can't wait until the BIG DAY! 

When they both called us last Saturday night, Jennifer said to me "I love your son and I am so excited to marry him!". What a sweetheart! The joy is written all over their faces!

An Exciting Announcement!

So as you can see Addie is going to be a "big sister". We are all very excited. Laura Lee is due on August 22nd, 2009. We can't wait to have another grand child. Being grandparents is THE BEST reward ever! 

Lynda with braces